Hawaii 2009

Age: Thirty-Four

     The Haider and Fonio Families decided to visit Hawaii in 2009. It was going to be an awesome vacation and fifteen of us would be making the trip. Well, fifteen and a half. I was six months pregnant with my soon to be, ten pound, twenty-three and a half inch baby boy. Now that is another story for another time.

     Two weeks before our departure, the eldest Fonio daughter, Tina, and her boyfriend Luke, announced to everyone that they were engaged to be married. Everyone just went crazy. There were hugs and kisses and tears and laughter. It would be the third wedding in our group and we loved any excuse to celebrate. Then the news got juicier. Once we all calmed down, they had one more announcement: They were to be married in Hawaii during our family vacation.

     The news stunned everyone. A few seconds passed and then you could see everyone’s wheels turning. How could they plan an entire wedding in two weeks? What should we do? How can we help?

     Noticing our concern, Tina tried to calm us down by saying, “It’s already been planned so you don’t need to worry about anything.”

     Before their announcement, Tina and Luke made a few phone calls, found a minister to marry them (by the ocean, of course), contacted a florist and called my favorite hotel, The Sheraton Moana Surfrider, and arranged a reception. It was all done—we just needed to show up!

     Wow, what a huge surprise! It actually took us longer to absorb the wedding news than it did for us to begin discussing dresses, the bridal shower and the bachelor and bachelorette parties. Tina and Luke were so cute to think that everything had been planned.

     Who knew that a trip to Hawaii could get more exciting, but there we were packing for a tropical vacation and a destination wedding.

     With the shower and bachelor/bachelorette parties nearly organized, dress shopping became the main focus. Well, the main focus for everyone except for me. I looked like a whale in every outfit I owned. And I still had four months to go! Luckily, I felt pretty good during my second trimester, so traveling was not the problem; fitting into any article of clothing was my problem.

     I tried to calm myself down by focusing on the positive. Okay what was the positive? Oh yes, my breasts were glorious. I swear from the chest up, I could have modeled swimsuits. That’s one part of my pregnant body I wish I could have kept. And my skin glowed like never before. For some reason, my pregnancy hormones fixed an acne problem that still haunts me today. No skin care product has ever treated my skin as well as those pregnancy hormones. Oh, how I long for that beautiful complexion again.

     Anyway, with my mom as trip director, fifteen and a half people caravanned to the airport and successfully boarded a plane bound for the Hawaiian Islands. We were a bit nervous about the eight hour flight with my eighteen month old daughter, but she traveled beautifully. She was, after all, the only grandchild at this point and was spoiled rotten with attention. And just as we started feeling a bit of cabin fever, the pilot announced our decent.

     Arriving in Hawaii is an awesome sight. The ocean turns from a deep, dark blue to an aquamarine that gives me chills just thinking about it. The Diamond Head Crater is majestic as it dominates the skyline of Honolulu and the lush green mountains in the backdrop are simply breathtaking. The open airport also plays a role Hawaii’s positive energy by allowing all travelers to feel the Hawaiian heat just by stepping off the airplane. And it felt so much better than the Minnesota winter we had left behind.

     Once organized, we hopped into our rental cars and headed for The Sheraton Waikiki Hotel. And if the word Waikiki doesn’t give it away, we stayed right along the beach, overlooking the ocean. It was truly awesome.

     Our rooms were a nice compliment to the atmosphere except for the placement. Somewhere in the midst of the room chaos, my sister Kate and her husband Adam acquired an adjoining room with my growing family. I was so worried that my baby girl would overstay her welcome next door but she managed to play it pretty cool. She’s a cool kid and I’m not just saying that because I am her mom (smile).

     My girl and the rest of us, totally embraced the island life by spending our days on Waikiki Beach basking in the sun and floating in the ocean. Of course, my beach body gave the term beach body, a whole new meaning. Let me reiterate for a second here, I looked like a whale in street clothes, so you can only imagine what my body looked like in my tankini. I was a sight. I like to believe that the glow from my butt white skin actually made it difficult for people to stare directly at me, sort of like the sun, making me somewhat camouflaged, if you will.

     My girl, on the other hand, was a hit. My mom had given her this purple leotard with a tutu and a headband that screamed, “Look at me!” And people did. One group of Japanese tourists took pictures of her, then approached me only to say, “Thank you for the pleasurable moment.” I smiled slightly confused, then chose to believe that they meant “she’s adorable.” It was fun to see my shy, little girl strut her stuff in that outfit. It sure brought out her inner Diva.

     And then there was “Big Baby.”

     “Big Baby” was a doll that my sister Kate had as a child. The thing was frightening to look at because it looked surprisingly real, disturbingly real, actually. My mom stashed it in a bag of old baby toys for years and my little babe ultimately found it and unfortunately loved it.

     I tried to be sneaky and remove “Big Baby” from our luggage before we left, but my girl noticed the disturbing toy’s absence and I was left with no choice. “Big Baby” was heading to the Hawaiian Islands.

     That horrible, life-like doll went everywhere with us, including the beach! You should have seen the double takes people made as we carried it in our beach bag with its head poking out or when we casually tossed it on our beach towel and left it in full sunlight. People must have thought that we were terrible human beings before realizing that it was a doll because bursts of laughter would follow disapproving looks and camera flashes would follow the laughter. “Big Baby” is probably on the internet somewhere with a caption reading, “World’s worst parents ever.”

     The last “Big Baby” incident occurred as we deplaned in the Minneapolis airport. As I walked by a flight attendant holding the doll I heard, “You better put some pants on that baby!” I laughed thinking good one until I realized that she was serious. “Big Baby” was wearing only a shirt! No diaper, no pants! I must have looked awful and turned around to explain myself but it was too late, the flight attendant was engulfed by a sea of red-eye passengers. Thanks a lot “Big Baby!”

     Fake baby drama aside, the trip was relatively relaxing. We all went at our own pace, heading out in small groups and large groups. There were little expectations so the mood was casual and cool.